I'm a big fuckin' dick 
I'm a pain in your ass 
I drink all your beer 
I'll eat the last slice 
I'll give you charley horses 
I'll pull your shorts down at the beach 
I always need a ride 
Nobody likes me 

My name's Steve Motherfucking Polychronopolous 

I spit when I talk 
I swear in front of your mother 
I throw shit at the movies 
I wear tight pants 
I ask you to buy an extra Yankee ticket 
And then I don't show 
I tell you I saw your girlfriend 
Fucking two guys at a party 

'Cause my name's Steve Motherfucking Polychronopolous 

I'll piss on your toilet seat and tell your dad you got stoned 
I'll borrow your jacket and never think of returning it 

Polychronopolous 
Pansy 
Pussy 
Shit for brains 
Douchebag 

I'll leave your gate open 
So your dog runs away 
I'll make fun of your pimple 
Then I'll grab your sister's ass 

'Cause my name's Steve Motherfucking Polychronopolous 

And I don't care 
And I don't give a shit 

I'll break your brother's stereo 
And then tell him it was you 
You think you're better than me 
Well you're fucking wrong 

Everybody knows I'm Steve Motherfucking Polychronopolous 

Deal with it