Waking up on the couch with empty beer cans everywhere
My place haven't been cleaned in years but I'm too lazy to care
I usually spend my days walking around in my underwear
Only talk to my neighbors when they got change to spare
I'm a scumbag
Always looking for a party to crash or a situation to intrude
I'm the reason people quit their jobs, I'm the reason people move
Never been blamed to be a nice guy, never had a classy act
I'm the guy who fucks your sister and never calls her back
Haven't worked a day in my life, I haven't even tried
My Welfare check is all I need to keep me satisfied
I spend it all on homemade booze, beer and cheap escorts
Then I'll give You a call when it's time to borrow some more
