You're the dude from high school I see at the gym
Or a friend of a friend, or a second cousin
You're a co-worker I sometimes eat lunch with
You're one of my many acquaintances

You know Christmas is about spending time with friends and family
But just because you're not in one of those 2 categories
Doesn't mean that I won't still do something special for you
Cause Christmas is about giving
So here's what I'll do
I'm gonna send you a Christmas text (Christmas text, Christmas text)
I'm gonna send you a Christmas text (Christmas text, Christmas text)
I'm gonna send you a Christmas text (Christmas text, Christmas text)
I'm gonna type Merry Christmas exclamation point, and then press send

Maybe I'll just copy and paste it (From a previous text)
Well it's only two words, I might as well just type it (Less complicated)
If you're thinking of calling me to thank me, oh please don't (That's not how this works)
Texting is as far as this relationship goes (And keep your response brief)

I have way more important people in my life, you're not even in the top fifty
It's not that I don't care about you, well yeah I don't really care about you
But, doesn't mean that I won't still do, something special for you
Cause Christmas is about giving
So here's what I'll do
I'm gonna send you a Christmas text (Christmas text, Christmas text)
I'm gonna send you a Christmas text (Christmas text, Christmas text)
I'm gonna send you a Christmas text (Christmas text, Christmas text)
I'm gonna type Merry Christmas exclamation point, and then press send

I don't care enough to call, but I don't not care enough to do nothing, all
I don't care enough to call, but I don't not care enough to do nothing, all
So I'll type Merry Christmas exclamation point and then press send
Merry Christmas exclamation point and then press send
Merry Christmas exclamation point and then press send

And to all of my non-Christian friends, I will text you: "Hey, dude what's goin on? We should totes hang next week".