You ask me if I know Manuel the bandito
I know Manuel well and you know
Manuel is the meanest and toughest and cruelest
Bandito in all Meh-ico

Many men die from the arms of Manuel
His eyes they can cut like the knife
You ask me if I know Manuel the bandito
Manuel is a good friend of mine

Why only just yesterday, riding my burro
Through the hills just off to the east
Manuel he appeared like it seemed out of nowhere
Pointing two big pistolas at me

He say: "Get off the donkey and empty your pockets
Better you do like I said
Or I pull on the trigger of my two big pistolas
Blow fucking great hole in your head"

So I empty my pockets, he say: "Not enough
I thin' Manuel just have some fun
You, get around the back and you lift up the tail
And you kiss on the donkey's bum"

So I do and I kiss and the donkey she shit 
In a filthy big heap on the ground
He wave the pistolas he laugh and say: "Eat!"
So I start eating donkey shit down

You ask me if I know Manuel the bandito
I know Manuel well and you know
Manuel is the meanest and toughest and cruelest
Son-of-bitch in all Meh-ico

So many men die from the arms of Manuel
His eyes they can cut like the knife
You ask me if I know Manuel the bandito
Manuel is a good friend of mine

But it's not just me frightened, my donkey is also
This I can tell for a fact
I thin' he remember one time once before
When I lift up his tail just like that

So he started kick me and he kick Manuel
And Manuel dropped the pistolas down
So I picked 'em up and I point 'em at him
I say: "Hey, Manuel is your turn now!"

You get around the back and you lift up his tail
And come on Manuel you kiss his arse
And you eat some shit -- see I leave some for you
Hey, Manuel, you thin' you so smart

Still you ask me if I know Manuel very well
Well, amigo, what more can I say?
Would you believe that me and Manuel
We had lunch together just yesterday!

Yet you ask me if I know Manuel the bandito
I know Manuel well now you know
Manuel is the meanest and toughest and cruelest
Motherfucker in all Meh-ico

So many men die from the arms of Manuel
His eyes they can cut like the knife
Still you ask me if I know Manuel the bandito
Manuel is a good friend of mine

But you keep asking if I know Manuel the bandito
We had lunch together just yesterday

Hey--ey--ey--ey