A Day Such as This

Pere Ubu

On a day such as this 
insist on more than the truth 
H 
Y 
P 
E R B 
O 
L 
E 

Today, 
dear poet, 
we must insist on more, 
more than the ordinary turn of phrase, 
other than the usual stock in trade 
Such a day as this cries out for emphasis 
Where are the thoughts that swing from the trees? 
Where are the hats that hang in the breeze? 
Where are the words that'll freshen the air like a shower? 
On a day such as this 
insist on more than the truth 
(What is the designate etiquette on such a day?) 

At last, 
by reasoning cast as a character peevishly bound, 
the solution comes clear: 
persevere! 
I was nearly drowned! 
(The folderol of fretful peregrination) 

It rained CATS 
It rained dogs 
It rained logs 
It rained HATS 
It rained trees 
It rained fleas 
It rained SPATS 
It rained boxes to put it all in 
(The trumpet call of rampant exaggeration) 

With each ensuing sneeze 
Raindrops shake from the leaves, 
and they shake from the trees, 
shake from the leaves of the sheltering trees 
Grumbling over the goats they go 
Mumbling under their coats they know 
Bundling into the boats they row 
Who knows where they go? 
They go where they go where they go 
(The folderol of fretful peregrination) 

Yo ho! 
Oh, ho! 
If the rain doesn't stop, 
and the boxes pile up, 
then we'll pass on the motion 
to bail out the ocean with buckets! 
That's the word that's overheard 
(The trumpet call of rampant exaggeration) 

(What is the designate etiquette on such a day?) 

Some will say the feet 
Some will say a dog 
Some will say a man's best friend is hyperbole