He thought he was as drunk as can be 
New white skinny rebel was he
Because he knew what mattered
It's all in a clatter of the bands he's seen 
His words of wisdom would shock 
Whether he meant them or not 
He'd save the world 
All the boys and the girls 
But another single's all he'd be

That's sad 
That's right
Another night
Of someone else's fantasy

He thought he was cool with his tunes 
He practised the knack in his room
And in the evening he'd DJ 
With the slider at eight plus
Believing that at his feet we swoom
Now he's always there in the queue
While down on the dance floor it's you
And when he starts playing 
He's up there playing 
You don't notice that they're not his tunes

He thought he could measure the world 
Because he loved the flag when unfurled 
First he's a lawyer, excellent debator
You should have heard the mud he hurled 
Now you've seen his face on TV 
Leading parliamentary 
When he makes decisions 
That meet your derision 
He reminds us all that we're free