Visiting a relative Afflicted with a sickness is Imperative in civilized life But I haven't had visitors In six consecutive winters And I have seven children and a wife They deny The memory of me Don't know why They vilify me with their lies It makes me want to cry I hide up in my hiding place Confined inside a private space The city citizens all do the same It's kinda wild, isn't it? The city's full of citizens Hesitantly pushing through the pain Minding my own business is The business I stay busy with The city citizens all do it too It's ridiculous, isn't it? The city's full of idiots All full of shit and foolish through and through Why I hide? It ain't hard to tell the answer why The child behind my disguise Dying my entire life So give me just a little bit Consider me a little kid Give me just a little more time If you deny the little bit At least give me a cigarette To kill myself a little more time Give me one more chance To line up all my stars and planets And just give myself a bit of good luck I promise to keep quittin' drinkin' Spend my evenings sittin', thinkin' Wondering how much I would chuck You shouldn't judge Another, even your own blood Your cousins, uncles, your true love Your drunk husband stumbles in mumbling something like True love is two hundred proof And to prove my love to you I will do the stupidest movements A dumb university student can do It wouldn't be prudent of you To sign a lease and move in with a dude With a bit of an issue with booze And a history who blew it with beautiful girls in his youth But now my usual routine is through Now I'm getting used to doing new moves And if music with grooves be the food For the cute little lovers, well, shoot Sure I could do a few tunes If you'll listen to a nuisance croon If you'll consider it a little bit The kid in not a wicked kid Just ignorant of his complicity I admit I was a piece of shit Though I maintain my innocence So the least you could do is visit me I'm living in a prison Though not the one I envisioned And it isn't in the city where I stay It's in between my ringing ears Incarcerated here for years Pretty baby, care for me today It isn't safe Outside the basement No escape And no replacement Know the way To break arrangements Don't delay Just stay complacent, babe The neighbors say I stay awake too late Taken all they can take They're making major changes starting now All that was made was made to change I have to say, my neighbor Call me crazy maybe we should chart it out That's when I produce my pen and paper That's when I begin To wage my war of words against my foe That's when I rebuke the truths That they knew as students With the cruelty of my voodoo, then I know That they won't disturb me I know that they don't Not want to hurt me But they've shown They don't deserve me It's gettin' old And it's getting dirty and gross The murder rate is going down But only in the other towns 'Round here they make their living selling death The coffin factory is packed The factory workers break their backs They'll buy their own ones soon Don't tell 'em yet You bet that I got coffee stains On every piece of cotton Cough myself into a coffin of my own It's often times I wonder How much evil has been done under the sun But that's impossible to know The coffin slowly closes Never more to open, no As they lower it into the Earth It's birth in reverse Only those who go into the dirt Can be certain if ghosts Are mostly only jokes Or if a ghost is just a person Cursed to eternal repose All I know is if they're haunting me It must be 'cause they want to see A geek with a paunch who needs TV to breathe Gee, that's gotta help their self esteem There's weeks I can't help but dream Of wealth and prestige as selfish as it seems Of a welcome mat laid out and only for me Before the lavishest mansion you ever did see That's where I separate irrevocably From society which is so oppressive to me I celebrate living in solitary 'cause it isn't as though it's involuntary I hold on with astonishing greed To the key to my miserable monastery When there's no one to admonish me Here, their authority, I abolish with ease I'd demolish all the walls but these So please give me a little bit Of considerate tenderness Give me just a little bit of love If you consent to visit me I'd forgive all this instantly I admit it - Give the kid a hug Won't you give the kid a little hug Forgiveness is the only drug To cure my sickness Visit me, my dear If only you would visit me The revisions to history would blow my mind I wish that you were near Is it fear That keeps me trapped Imprisoned here With his last gasp The captain cheers Tied to the mast The water clear The waves are crashing It's not the fear It's not the fashion It's not the beer It's not compassion It's not the truth That I am telling It is the fear That keeps me here Yelling through my well known tears Celibacy evidently Isn't too relevant to me Dutifully fuck myself each time Fucking myself over every day I'm supposed to know by now The road I chose is bogus I'll keep lying I'll keep lying to myself Lying to everybody else Denying that my life is gonna last It's a life sentence I must serve There's no repentance too absurd I'll keep lying, saying it'll pass That's a laugh It's a mask that I'm wearing It's my plastic protection And a black jacket snatched From the classics collection And a hat slanted backwards In a wacky direction I've effectively resurrected sad reflection Such a bastard He mastered a craft of the past Then he cast it in plaster Then after the class He kissed ass with the instructors Making them laugh At his asinine jabbering It had to be magic Dazzled and flabbergasted They were frazzled So they flat out gave Everything he had asked for It was cash by the basketful Acid and grass It was madness He grabbed for the stash and he dashed The total package was just total trash So I refuse to give a shit Not even a little bit And I refuse to give the kid a break It's strictly illegitimate The business that this prick is in I'm witnessing him make it being fake I've taken all that I can take Just like my neighbors used to say And I'm about to vaporize them all My laser aims at they who would replace me They will taste the pain and pay me Then they'll take five Tylenol Can I call The impostor by his name? Would you fall For his preposterous game? Can I say Who this monstrous freak could be? Can't you see It is me and only me? So why is it you won't give in And visit me, please? Very sincerely Patrick PO box 110993 Patrick PO box 110993 Patrick PO box 110993 Patrick PO box 110993 Please write to me