children running down the street in uniforms laughing in the rain and heading towards me, they were yelling about something they were singing in code, something like ten dead men on a dead mans chest, fight the war forget about the rest they were searching for sunlight they were searching for gold so i, catch a fever from the inside dig my hands into my pockets open up my wallet such a strange gesture to make in this town sure, it ain't gold but it gets me around then i grab a twenty from the inside hand it to the smallest, tell him spend it wisely he looks up at me then back at the ground i just wish he'll fuckin turn right around now i talk to myself late at night but i try to connect with the ghost who was a best friend my brother, my accomplice, another writer, my best man and sometimes i feel so forgiven at night i just put down the shades but i open my window the bad luck just leaves me, i hear ben tell me brother, you're home i think it all started in the summer '98 in normandy new jersey, later in the day i was thinking about existence, and unaccepting fate i was 14 years old, but what else can i say even then i knew time was gunna catch me i graduated private school in the summer of '02 my first true love had left me and i didn't know what to do i moved into new york and i thought i found the truth a pipe, grass, full of patties and pills you shouldn't chew well, i swore that the drugs were gunna kill me i was wrong i was wrong, i was ready to fall i tried to blame myself because she was gone i didn't know that she was unaffected, but that look gave you a needle and i knew that the drugs were gunna kill her fast forward to the fall of '05 I met the girl of my dreams, and she helped me survive then she left my life in complicated times in march of '06 i attempted suicide well, i know that sudafed can't kill me to everyone i knew, yeah, i apologize sorry mom and dad i never meant to make you cry thanks to all my friends you're the reason i'm alive you make everyday worth living in this river called time well, it'll take more than bad luck just to kill me rings and things and birds and sounds i got ten years of words buried in the ground theyre being reassembled by the ghost of ben brown he's adapting the screenplay even still now he better cast someone cool like johnny depp to play me the child took my 20 and he looked me in the eyes he said thanks mister for the gold, continued walking by i could see him proudly show his friends it made me wanna cry cause all i could do was think of mine, i know i'm a lucky guy and thank you all for everything i miss you all, goodnight